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  • here’s no dinner bell at Maplewood. No assigned seating. But everyone has their spot. Mine was the same for over a year—third table from the window, left-hand side. The one with a view of the garden and just enough sunlight in the afternoon. Mine.

    Until Eve arrived.

    Eve is early. Always. Gliding in like she’s stepping onto a stage, head high, eyes half-lidded in a way that makes her look like she’s perpetually under soft lighting. She doesn’t say much, but her presence says enough.

    She sits where she pleases. And lately, that means my seat.No apologies. No “Do you mind?” She just… occupies. Her shawl flung dramatically over the backrest, her purse sitting on the table like a small, glittering pet.

    She’s never acknowledged me. Never asked if the seat was taken. I wasn’t even sure she knew I existed.

    Until today.Today, I got there early. Earlier than usual. Determined. I parked myself in my spot with the quiet, stubborn satisfaction of a man reclaiming something that was rightfully his.

    A few minutes later, the doors opened.

    Eve entered.

    She moved through the dining room like a pageant finalist, all graceful smiles and silent greetings, her eyes flicking politely over the crowd as if scanning for someone worth speaking to.

    She saw me in the seat. Her face didn’t change. Not a blink. No reaction.

    I thought maybe—just maybe—she’d choose a different table.

    But no.

    She walked right up, turned slowly, and sat down directly across from me.

    Across. From me.

    She smoothed the front of her blouse, folded her napkin with both hands, then finally looked up.

    “How’s your day going?” she asked, like we’d been sharing this table for years.

    Her voice was soft. Calm. Pleasant. The kind that floats, doesn’t press. But it caught me off guard. She had never spoken to me before.

    I blinked. “It’s fine,” I muttered. “Yours?”

    She smiled—not a full one, just the kind where the corners of her mouth like she’s posing for a photo.“Lovely,” she said. And then she looked away, already finished with me.

    And we sat there, across from each other. Two strangers, neither quite willing to move. The table suddenly felt smaller than it ever had before.

    I picked at my lunch, watching the sunlight hit the window just right—like it used to when I sat here alone.

    I didn’t say anything else. Neither did she.But I knew what I was thinking: I had hoped she would pick another table.

    And now, I’m not even sure which one of us is winning.

    As Stephany the server approached, I kept my eyes on the window.

    Out in the yard, the doe and her fawn were back again, chomping on the grass near the birdbath. The little one’s legs still looked shaky, like it was figuring them out with each step. I watched them like I always do, like they were part of my own routine. A quiet scene I counted on—steady, gentle, undemanding.

    Stephany set down my lunch tray. “Here we go,” she said softly.I nodded, still watching the deer. “Right by the lilac bush,” I said, mostly to myself.

    Stephany glanced out the window, caught sight of them, and smiled. “You’ve got the best view in the house today.”

    I didn’t say anything. She set Eve’s tray down across from me next, without a word between them. I don’t think Eve even looked up.

    She picked up her fork with perfect posture, like she was at a garden luncheon in a movie. Not a sound from her chair. No comment about the deer. No acknowledgment of me, or the fact that I was already sitting here when she walked in.

    I took a bite of my sandwich and glanced at her once. Nothing. She wasn’t smiling now. She just ate—like she belonged here, like she always had.

    And I sat there, chewing slowly, trying not to feel like a guest at my own table.

    Of course, Eve had to look.

    She noticed my gaze out the window and, like she couldn’t help herself, turned her head to see what had my attention. For a second, she was quiet, and I hoped—foolishly—that she’d just leave it at that.But then she asked, “What are you watching?”

    Just like that, the peaceful moment was gone—cut through by her voice, soft but intrusive, like a violin string in a room that had been perfectly still.

    I kept my eyes on the yard. “That doe and her baby,” I said.

    I could feel her looking at me, not the window. Not the deer. Still curious, still nosing in, like she didn’t quite understand the meaning of quiet.

    She didn’t say anything. Just sat there, waiting.

    So finally, I turned slightly and added, “A family of deer.”She nodded slowly, as if I’d just explained something much deeper. Then she looked back out the window for a moment, but not long. Not the way I did.

    It wasn’t hers. That view. That moment.

    But she was here now, across from me, poking little holes in the silence.

    And just like that, lunch wasn’t mine anymore either.She then declared, “I love animals.”Yea?” I replied, keeping it short, flat. A verbal speed bump, hoping she’d slow down, maybe even stop.

    But she didn’t.Oh, they’re beautiful! I love animals!” she repeated, louder this time, like maybe I hadn’t heard her the first time or hadn’t given the proper enthusiasm in return.

    I blinked, slowly, still staring out the window—but now the deer weren’t calming anymore. Now they were just an excuse not to look at her.

    That’s when it started to click. Something about the way she said it—twice, too brightly, with that far-off glimmer in her eyes.

    Maybe she’s not all there, I thought.That strange kind of off-kilter cheer some people wear like a mask that doesn’t quite fit. The too-wide smile. The blank curiosity. The way she’d never once called me by name, even though we’d eaten at the same table all week.

    I didn’t answer her that time. Just nodded a little and went back to my sandwich.Let her talk to the deer if she wants to.

    The next morning, 8:30, I brushed my teeth and quickly rushed down for breakfast. I wasn’t going to lose the table again—not without a fight. As I rolled into the dining room, I scanned the maze of chairs and trays.

    Still early. Still gliding.

    But this time, I was already there.

    Except—I wasn’t. Not really.

    Because as I rounded the final turnenjoy the calm before the inevitable.

    there she was. Eve. Sitting at the table. My table. That same seat, same silly grin stretched across her face like she knew exactly what she’d done.

    I took a breath. Rolled over to our—err, my—table and propped myself there. The aides saw it happen. They gave each other a small smirk and giggle as they handed me my coffee, waiting—almost holding their breath—for the performan, my signature eye roll.They laughed quietly behind their hands and moved on.

    Eve didn’t say anything. Just kept smiling.

    Of course she did.As I sipped my coffee, Eve said, “I saw them coming down the hill this morning.”What?” I asked, meaning—what was it that she saw?”The antelope,” she answe Antelope? I thought. What are we, in the froze tundra of northern Europe?

  • DEBRA THE TEASE

    So, it didn’t take long.

    After dinner, I made my way back to my room, weaving through the usual traffic jam of walkers and scooters. I had barely parked myself when my phone buzzed.

    You guessed it. Debra.I didn’t even have to open the text — I knew what she wanted. Attention. Maybe a little brace trouble, maybe not. Mostly just wanted me.let it sit there for a while, the screen glowing like some needy little reminder. Five minutes. Then ten. Let her stew. Build the suspense. She wanted more help with her hefty naturals! O, we’ll call it her brace. I figured now’s my chance to cup those funbags. I messaged back, be there in five’

    She met me at her door. As I roll in I said. I don’t think it’s gonna work. Your chest is way too big! What are they, double D’s?

    “Yes,” she proudly answered. “How’d you guess? Maybe you’ve got a lot of experience.”

    She starts taking off her pajama top and bra to expose that hefty bust of hers! That’s when I decided to go for it with my right hand, the one that still has some sensation.No tension, I was just giving them both a good once-over while describing how they were so perfect. Actually, to be honest, I must say they were perfect. Nice areolas, pretty shade of pink and about the size of a quarter. I don’t care too much for huge saucer-sized ones.

    Jack Junior wasn’t in any hurry either. Then Debra says, “Why don’t you lay down in bed with me?”

    I hesitated for a second, knowing where this was leading.

    One part of me was already thinking ahead. Don’t want this to be a boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

    So then I decided might as well go for it!

    Just then she started to push my shorts down to take a look at Junior, who by now had started losing his girth as well as his interest!

    “I really need to get going,” I said.

    She replied with, “I wanna go down on you.”

    Wow, I thought. Might be worth staying a while longer. Jack Junior seemed to be alright with that, so I stayed.

    Well, she started to work her way down, laid her head on my belly — and fell asleep.

    Thinking this was clearly not worth it, I pulled up my Hanes briefs, worked my way back into my wheelchair, and hit the road. Just another night ho-hum..


  • A short story by Jack


    Tuesday morning, nothing happening so I decided to visit with Sam.

    “Top of the morning?” I said, rolling myself toward him.. “What’d you do, win a free pudding cup?”You ever have grandkids, Jack?” Sam asked.

    I took a sip of my coffee— somehow both weak and burnt. A true masterpiece of cafeteria alchemy.

    “No,” I said. “I skipped straight to cranky old man without the legacy part.”

    He chuckled, then turned back toward the entrance.

    “My grandaughter’s coming today for a visit.She’s a good kid. Jenna. That’s her name—Jenna.”

    I nodded, but in my head, I was already making a mental sticky note: Lock it in, Sam. Jenna. Don’t lose it before she walks through that doo r.It was mid-afternoon when Jack first saw Jenna enter the facility. The front lobby door buzzed open, and in walked this young person — short hair, oversized flannel shirt, baggy jeans, and sneakers. For a split second, Jack didn’t recognize her.

    Then it hit him — That’s Jenna.

    Sam’s face lit up as soon as he saw her.

    “There’s my girl!” Sam said, his voice cracking slightly.Jenna smiled warmly and sat down next to him.

    Jack stayed off to the side, but he couldn’t help observing. He hadn’t seen Jenna in months, not since she started talking about the transition.

    As they talked, Oscar, naturally wandering by at just the wrong moment, whispered to Jack:

    “Is that his granddaughter?””Yes, Oscar.”
    “Looks… different,” Oscar whispered loudly, not really whispering at all.
    Jack nodded, trying to shut him up before it got worse.
    But Oscar kept going,
    “Is that the one… you know… the operation one?”
    Jack sighed, “Oscar — she’s transitioning. Leave it there.”

    Oscar squinted again, as if the word needed physical effort to understand.

    “But… she’s becoming a boy?””Yes.”
    “So… not his granddaughter no more?”
    “Oscar. Stop.”Jenna looked over and smiled politely, fully aware they were talking about her but too kind to say anything. She turned back to Sam, who gently patted her hand.

    “You know I love you no matter what,” Sam said softly.

    laterScene: Dining Room, Late Afternoon

    The dining room had already begun its familiar shuffle — trays sliding, forks clinking, and conversations looping like broken records. Jack sat at his usual table, mid-sip of something that once aspired to be coffee. Sam sat at the next table over, staring quietly out the window, lips moving slightly, as if he were reciting a memory only he could hear.

    “Hey Sam,” Jack said gently. “You okay?”

    Sam turned his head slowly. “Did I miss the bus?” he asked, not really expecting an answer. His eyes were watery.

  • THE SOFA KING

    [Scene: Dining Room — Breakfast Rush]

    The clatter of utensils and the low murmur of half-awake residents filled the dining room like background static. I was sitting quietly at my usual table, enjoying my coffee, when the double doors suddenly swung open like the entrance to a prize fight.

    In stormed Pete — loud, boisterous, and radiating the kind of energy that screamed, “Your day officially starts now, because I’m here.” He didn’t just enter a room. Pete announces his arrival! As if the rest of us had been sitting around waiting for his grand entrance.

    “GOOD MORNING EVERYBODY!”Every fork in the room paused mid-air. I gave my signature eyeroll that got a giggle from a lady sitting at the table next to me.

    Pete strutted past the tables like a game show host on the wrong set, clapping Big Don on the shoulder so hard he nearly knocked the poor guy’s toast onto the floor.

    He didn’t need a microphone. Pete brought his own acoustics.

    Damn, I thought. One day he’s going to walk in tossing roses and throwing T-shirts into the crowd.

    He landed at the table next to me, where Gil and Jerry were already seated. From the way they greeted him, you’d think they were warming up the laugh track.I kept listening, curious what flavor of delusion he was serving today.

    Pete launched into one of his usuals, chest puffed out as he began another round of tales about his empire.

    “I got a call from my manager yesterday, he wants to know when I’m coming to the store to check all the orders.”

    Oh great, here we go.

    I mimicked just loud enough for the whole table to catch it:

    “Yeah, you’re sofa king loud, I thought the fire alarm went off.”

    Virginia, sitting across from me, snorted into her oatmeal like a kid trying to hold back a laugh in church.

    Pete blinked for a second, then burst out with that big, clueless laugh of his, not realizing the joke had already left the station.

    From that morning on, Pete was The SOFA KING — self-appointed, Jack-certified.

    Scene: Dining Room — The Next Day, Same Table]

    I didn’t even blink, just stirred my coffee like I was calculating the cost of surviving another one of his speeches.

    “The Sofa King has arrived!”

    Virginia nearly choked on her toast, stifling another laugh.

    He leaned over, too close as usual, and said, “Jack, I can give you a break on a beautiful leather recliner! You interested?”

    “Oh no thanks, I’m good.”

    “You’re a tough customer, Jack. But you know where to find me!”

    Oh, I knew exactly where — usually about six decibels too loud and two feet too close.

    There goes The SOFA KING.

    “Sofa King, Obnoxious!


  • The Karaoke King

    The other day I was coming out of my room just as Mike was passing by. I gave him a polite, “Hi, Mike,” as I turned toward the elevator. Without missing a beat, he fired back, “I don’t have to talk to you!”

    Well, great. I thought to myself, “You  freeking  weirdo!”

    I rolled  into the elevator, and just as the doors were about to close, Mike stepped in right next to me — like nothing had happened. At first, I figured he was on his phone, so I ignored it. Then he blurted out, “I’m looking for Viola.”

    Christ. After that warm greeting, the last thing I was about to do was give him directions. I don’t even know anyone named Viola. I decided to let that one hang in the air and stayed quiet. When the elevator doors opened, he stepped out without a word, just shot me this look of pure disdain — like I’d somehow ruined his day.Later that day, at dinner, I spotted him sitting at table six, holding court with three women fawning over him while he sang along to Summer Wind, the Sinatra classic — like he was the second coming of the Chairman of the Board.

    A few days later, I was wearing my old Allman Brothers Live at the Fillmore T-shirt. As I rolled past Mike, he locked eyes with me and said, “You like good music, huh?”

    Not wanting to get too chummy, I just gave him a quick nod and kept right on rolling.Later, at dinner, I started telling Hank and Jimmy about my run-in with Mike. Both of them let out a loud roar of laughter. “That’s what he does,” Hank said. “Yeah, you know how many times I’ve seen him walking around talking to himself?” Jimmy added.

    “Don’t know, but that can’t be good!” I replied.

    The Karaoke King had clearly made his mark on the place, and from the looks of it, the show was just getting started. A little while later Oscar came along and sat with us just as “Hound dog” was starting. ” That guy’s menta!l”he declares. Alex asks” Oh, you know him?” “Yea his room is next to mine and I hear him talking and singing all night.” He answers.So, I just had to ask, does he ever fight with himself? No, but sometimes out of nowhere I hear him laughing really loud like some kind of demon! It’s scary.

  • Betty THE SCAM ARTIST

    I got a text one random day from someone asking if I recognized the number.

    “No,” I answered.

    A second text quickly followed: could they send me a picture, maybe I’d recognize them. Curious and already suspicious, I said okay—just to see where this was headed.

    Next thing I knew, we were chatting on WhatsApp. Betty sent me a picture—a very pretty girl, along with a neat little bio: 43, divorced, living in California.

    But something smelled off. The picture wasn’t just a selfie—it was a photo of a woman taking a selfie, like someone had taken a snapshot of a stranger mid-pose. I thought, if she just snapped this, why not send the selfie itself? Hmmm. Red flag.

    Then came the next line. She told me she was from France.

    “Wow,” I replied, playing along. “Coincidence—my favorite singer is Stella Jang. A lot of her songs are in French.”

    I left that statement dangling like bait, curious how she’d respond. Anyone with a clue would’ve noticed the oddity—Stella Jang is South Korean, not French. But Betty replied two minutes later without skipping a beat:

    “My favorite singer is Adele Adler.”

    Adele Adler? Now she wasn’t even trying. Everybody knows her as Adele! The whole thing smelled like a lazy catfish operation. But I had time to kill, so why not play along a little longer?

    I sent a simple “TTYL” and rolled downstairs for dinner, already planning the next round of this little game.

    Under Caffeine


    A few days went by, no sign of Betty. Then, on Sunday, while I was halfway through lunch, my WhatsApp alert chimed. Betty.

    I let it sit until I finished eating, figuring I’d need a strong coffee for this nonsense. I wheeled over to the coffee vending machine, and there she was—the immovable object. “Sloppy Janet” is a mountain of a woman. The nickname is almost too kind. She’s so large she can’t even stand up from her wheelchair. But size isn’t what bothers me—it’s her total lack of self-awareness. She parks herself at the machine like she’s got all the time in the world, completely oblivious to the line growing behind her.Just like that B52s lyric:

    “Hop in my Chrysler, it’s as big as a whale and it’s about to set sail!”

    Meanwhile, Betty’s message just sat there on my phone, the digital bait still dangling.

    Just another day under-caffeinated. Dammit, Janet!

  • Wheelchair stories

    Living in an assisted living facility is no fun so Jack does his best to try to get along by making lighthearted fun of the life and some of the others by making jokes to himself about all the goings on and some interesting people.Here are some of their stories.

  • Wheelchair Journals

    The big surprise

    It was a night like any other. I came home to my one-room apartment, fried up a couple of steak and onion sandwiches, watched a story on TV, then took my shower and went to bed.

    Sometime in the middle of the night, I was ripped from sleep by harsh flashlights piercing my eyes, voices calling my name. By the time they got me on the gurney and loaded me into the ambulance, I started to come around. That’s when I realized the worst: a stroke.

    God damn it! Just as things were finally going right for me. Bills all paid. A nice new Honda. My head spun, but not from the stroke. It was the thought that everything I’d worked for, everything I’d built, might be slipping through my fingers.

    The EMT wheeled me into the hospital, and as the doors slid open, I caught a faint whiff in the air. The triage nurse was the first to speak.

    “What’s that smell?” she asked, wrinkling her nose.

    “Urine,” the EMT replied, as if it was the most mundane thing in the world.

    I could feel the heat creeping up my neck. The kind of heat that comes with embarrasment!Jack’s eyes flickered open, his mind groggy and unfocused. The dull hum of hospital machinery buzzed in the background. As his vision cleared, a familiar face appeared — Tina, his sister-in-law, perched on the edge of a stiff plastic chair. Her face lit up the moment she saw him blink.

    “There you are,” she said with a smile, her voice calm but edged with relief. “Took you long enough.”

    Jack tried to speak, but his throat was dry, and his words came out as a rasp. Tina was already on her feet, pouring water into a cup.

    “Don’t try too hard,” she said, placing the cup in his shaky hand. “Just sip.”

    As Jack drank, Tina grabbed a small notebook from her bag, flipping it open like a seasoned manager about to run a board meeting.

    “I’ve got it all under control,” she announced. “The doctors, the insurance… I just need your card or account number. Oh, and your cell bill — I’ll take care of that too.”

    Jack managed a weak smile. Classic Tina. Always practical, always prepared — and always worried about something. He didn’t have to ask if she’d been sitting there all night; he knew she had.

    “You sure know how to make a guy feel important,” Jack croaked, his voice barely above a whisper.

    Tina snorted. “Don’t get used to it.”

    But her hand stayed on his for a moment longer than necessary. It wasn’t just business — she cared deeply, and Jack knew it. In that moment, surrounded by wires and sterile hospital walls, Tina’s presence was the strongest comfort he could have asked for.

  • WHEELCHAIR JOURNALS

    WHEELCHAIR JOURNALS

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    The Big Surprise

    This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is paramedics-taking-patient-on-stretcher-from-ambulance-to-hospital-73807258-5a88d8d46edd6500367cbb75-scaled.jpg
    It was a night like any other. I came home to my one-room apartment, fried up a couple of steak and onion sandwiches, watched a story on TV, then took my shower and went to bed. Sometime in the middle of the night, I was ripped from sleep by harsh flashlights piercing my eyes, voices calling my name. By the time they got me on the gurney and loaded me into the ambulance, I started to come around. That’s when I realized the worst: a stroke .God damn it! Just as things were going right for me. Bills all paid. A nice Honda bought and paid for in cash. My head spun, but not from the stroke. It was the thought that everything I’d worked for, everything I’d built, might be slipping through my fingers. .Next day Jacks’ eyes flickered open, his mind groggy and unfocused. The dull hum of hospital machinery buzzed in the background. As his vision cleared, a familiar face appeared — Tina, his sister-in-law, perched on the edge of a stiff plastic chair. Her face lit up the moment she saw him blink.
    “There you are,” she said with a smile, her voice calm but edged with relief. “Took you long enough.”
    Jack tried to speak, but his throat was dry, and his words came out as a rasp. Tina was already on her feet, pouring water into a cup.
    “Don’t try too hard,” she said, placing the cup in his shaky hand. “Just sip.”
    As Jack drank, Tina grabbed a small notebook from her bag, flipping it open like a seasoned manager about to run a board meeting.
    “I’ve got it all under control,” she announced. “The doctors, the insurance… I just need your card or account number. Oh, and your cell bill — I’ll take care of that too.”
    Jack managed a weak smile. Classic Tina. Always practical, always prepared — and always worried about something. He didn’t have to ask if she’d been sitting there all night; he knew she had.
    “You sure know how to make a guy feel important,” Jack croaked, his voice barely above a whisper.
    Tina snorted. “Don’t get used to it.”
    But her hand stayed on his for a moment longer than necessary. It wasn’t just business — she cared deeply, and Jack knew it. In that moment, surrounded by wires and sterile hospital walls, Tina’s presence was the strongest comfort he could have asked for.


    Jack had only been in the facility a couple of days, still learning the layout and avoiding eye contact whenever possible. He waited in the hallway near the elevator, just trying to get to the coffee station without having to talk to anyone.
    But of course, the universe had other plans.
    From the far end of the corridor, a figure slowly inched forward, hunched and awkward, weaving like a man navigating invisible tripwires. Jack squinted. Oh no. Another one. The guy was coming straight for him.
    “Hey there, new guy! I’m Gus,” the man said cheerfully, one shoulder dramatically higher than the other. His voice was loud, like someone who had never mastered indoor volume.
    Jack offered a polite, forced smile. “Hi.”
    “I saw you move in the other day. Room 114B, right? That was Mrs. Kessler’s room. She left because her daughter wanted her closer to the family, but between you and me, I think it had something to do with the chicken salad incident.”
    Jack blinked. “…The what?”
    “Oh, never mind, long story. You’ll hear it eventually. Everyone does. So! You like bingo? No? Me neither, but I go for the cookies. Did you meet Hank yet? Big guy, laughs like a drain pipe. And watch out for Thelma, she’ll talk your ear off about her feet.”
    Jack nodded slowly, his internal monologue already spinning. Great. A human newsletter.
    Just then, the elevator dinged. Jack pressed the button quickly, praying for a silent ride.
    “You know,” Gus continued as he shifted next to Jack, “you’ve got a good spot, room-wise. Not too close to the trash chute. That thing’s louder than a brass band.”
    The elevator doors opened. Jack rolled in, turning his chair just in time to see Gus trying to wedge himself in beside him.
    “I’ll take the next one,” Jack said quickly, not out of politeness but pure survival instinct.
    Gus smiled. “Suit yourself, buddy!”
    As the doors closed, Jack let out a breath and muttered, “So it begins. The next day at lunch, just as he was about to take my last bite of his sandwich, a very slight dude suddenly appeared in front of him.
    “Hi! I’m Oscar,” he announced, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. Before Jack could even acknowledge him, he launched into a monologue about how much he loved helping everyone.
    It immediately took him back to first grade. There was this girl named Melissa who prided herself on being the teacher’s helper—a real ass-kisser!
    So then, Oscar invites Jack to sit with him at Table 8. That works—better than sitting alone.
    Later that day, he goes down to the dining room. As he enters he glances over to see Oscar watching for him.He thinks to himself, well, here we go.
    He rolls over to the table as the server approaches. “What’ll it be, gentlemen?” . “I think beef stew over egg noodles sounds interesting. I’ll have that.”
    Oscar, still examining the menu, says, “I’ll have the usual. A hamburger, wel done.l “Well, Oscar, you’re full of surprises today,” Vera states. Her sarcasm falls flat as he sheepishly just gapes at her. She then gives Jack a look, and he smirks, letting her know that he I got her joke.
    ” cell number?” Debrah asked. he hesitates. “Sure,” He I said, fishing his phone from his my pocket.
    Jack’s New World
    Jack had always prided himself on his independence. He was the guy who could fix anything, grill a perfect steak, and outwit anyone with his sharp tongue. But that was before the stroke. Before his body betrayed him. Before he found himself here— Maplewood Assisted Living, a place where time crawled and the walls smelled faintly of antiseptic and overcooked vegetables.
    His left side was weak, his speech slower than he liked, but his mind? Oh, his mind was as sharp as ever. He’d quickly learned that Maplewood was filled with characters straight out of a sitcom. Gus, the gossip king, knew everything about everyone before they did. Virginia, tough as nails, didn’t sugarcoat a damn thing. And then there was Maude, who had the charm of a brick wall and looked at Jack like he was an annoying housefly.
    Jack’s biggest challenge wasn’t the stroke—it was keeping his patience,. People insisted on helping him when he didn’t need it. Every time he wheeled himself down the hall, some well-meaning aide would chirp, “Need a push, Jack?”
    “Nope, just training for the Indy 500,” he’d quip, rolling his eyes.
    Meals were another battle. One evening, he sat down to a plate of something that was allegedly meatloaf. He poked at it suspiciously.
    “What’s wrong?” Virginia asked, noticing his hesitation.
    “Nothing. Just trying to figure out if this is food or a science experiment.”
    Virginia chuckled. “Just eat it before it eats you.”
    Despite the annoyances, Jack found ways to keep himself entertained. He made a game out of dodging the ever-chatty Ron, who could talk for twenty minutes without taking a breath. Most times, Jack would try to roll past him as stealthily as possible. He kept a mental tally of how many times The Shadow, a resident who appeared out of nowhere, startled him in the hallway.
    But the best part of Maplewood? The people who got it. Like Jimmy, who wore a New York Rangers shirt one day and ended up talking hockey with Jack for an hour. Jack wasn’t the same man he was before the stroke. He knew that. But he also knew this—he wasn’t done yet. And as long as he had his wit, his sarcasm, and maybe, just maybe, a few people worth talking to, he could handle this new world just fine.
    Knowing his career was over, he constantly thought of what he could do now for a living—after all, Social Security wasn’t going to be enough to live on. His first idea was to raise tropical fish. Bad idea! Next, he remembered the scammer who once tried to con him into investing in gold. That sparked a thought—maybe he could do something with investing. His younger brother had done well with blogging and all that internet stuff. Perhaps a blog about investing in gold and other precious metals, for Jack was a jeweler prior to all this trouble it could work because Jack did understand the relationship between gold and the economy. Jack smirked at the thought. If nothing else, it would keep him busy—and keep his mind sharp. And who knew? Maybe it could actually make him some money.
    The following days, Jack couldn’t stop thinking about this idea. He spent hours trying to come up with a good, catchy name for his blog. Every scrap of paper within reach became a brainstorming pad. “Gold Rush Daily? No, too dramatic. The Gilded Edge? Neh. Nuggets of Truth? Ugh.” He muttered to himself while wheeling through the halls, earning puzzled looks from passersby. But he didn’t care. He was happier as long as he could just be on his way quietly without being bothered They just avoided him. The idea lit a fire in him. For the first time in a long time, Jack had something that felt like purpose—and he wasn’t letting go of it anytime soon.

    Betty the Scammer – A Digital Detour

    I got a text one day from someone asking if I recognized the number.

    “No,” I answered.

    Then another text. Could they send a pic—maybe I’d recognize them. Okay, I thought. I was interested in what this was really about.

    Soon we started communicating on WhatsApp. Betty sent me a picture—a very pretty girl along with a little bio: 43, divorced, and living in California.

    But something didn’t sit right. The picture wasn’t just a selfie—it was a picture of a woman taking a selfie. Like someone had captured a stranger mid-pose and sent it along as their own. If she just took the photo, why not send the selfie itself? Hmmm.

    Then she told me she was from France.

    “Wow,” I replied. “Coincidence—my favorite singer is Stella Jang. A lot of her songs are sung in the French language.”

    And then I left that to hang. I wanted to see what kind of reaction she’d give. I mean, Stella Jang is South Korean. If Betty were actually from France, wouldn’t she at least question that? Ask why the name didn’t sound French?

    But no. Two minutes later, she replied:

    “My favorite singer is Adele Adler.”

    Adele Adler? Not even trying.

    That’s when I knew—I wasn’t talking to a lonely 43-year-old French-American divorcee. I was talking to someone who just googled “popular female names” and hoped for the best.

    Still, I decided to play along. Hell, I’ve got nowhere to go anyway.

    I sent her a polite “TTYL” and headed down for dinner.

    Game on, Betty.

    UNDER CAFFEINE

    A few days went by, no sign of Betty. Then, on Sunday, while I was halfway through lunch, my WhatsApp alert chimed. Betty.

    I let it sit until I finished eating, figuring I’d need a strong coffee for this nonsense. I wheeled over to the coffee vending machine, and there she was. The immovable object. “Big Barbara.”

    Big Barbara is a mountain of a woman. The nickname is almost too kind. She’s so large she can’t even stand up from her wheelchair. But size isn’t what bothers me—it’s her total lack of self-awareness. She parks herself at the machine like she’s got all the time in the world, completely oblivious to the line growing behind her.

    I sat there stuck, caffeine-starved and blocked by Barbara, waiting for her glacial pace to release the coffee hostage. The whole scene made me think of that old B-52’s lyric:

    “Hop in my Chrysler, it’s as big as a whale and it’s about to set sail!”

    Meanwhile, Betty’s message just sat there on my phone, the digital bait still dangling.

    Just another day under-caffeinated. Dammit, Barbara Finally, I read the message of how she made over one hundred thousand dollars between friday and saturday. Would I be interested? Interested? I thought YEA! I’d be interested in becoming A Kept Man!. hahaha. Anyway, I figured I’ll wait to answer in the morning.

  • Wheelchair stories

    The Big Surprise

    The Big Surprise

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    Tell your story

    Atlanta, GA, USA

    Mon, Jan 1

    “Stories, historias, iсторії, iστορίες

    Mexico City, Mexico

    Mon, Jan 1

    Tell your story

    Thornville, OH, USA

    Mon, Jan 1

    Thornville, OH, USA

    Mon, Jan 1

    Jacks story

    After a stroke left Jack disabled he ended up in an assisted living facility. It seems more like a retirement home. Hoping to overcome this inability to walk along with the paralysis of his left arm, everyday is a struggle. His coping mechanism is his humor, even if he’s entertaining only himself. His frustrations are turned inward with sarcastic remarksto himself toward his quirky neighbors Now most of his neighbors although alittle off or even wacky are wonderful people With this group of offbeat friends and neighbors Jack likes to have fun with it. These are some of their stories. Jack Meets Oscar

    Jack’s first day at the facility was already shaping up to be a test of patience. Between the overly cheerful staff, the awkward introductions, and the general sense of being trapped in a place he wasn’t ready to call home, he was already exhausted.

    Then came Oscar.

    “Hey there, pal! You’re new, huh?” The voice came before Jack even saw him. And then, waddling into view, came Oscar—short, hunched over, and moving with an awkward gait that made it look like he was battling gravity itself.

    Jack barely had time to respond before Oscar launched into a full-blown report.

    “You hear about the lady on the third floor? Fell right in front of the vending machine. Took two nurses and Gus to get her up. And the kitchen’s out of real eggs again—only that powdered crap today. Oh, and Big Don nearly choked on a meatball at lunch, but he’s fine now. So, what’s your name?”

    Jack blinked. “Uh… Jack.”

    Oscar nodded as if mentally filing that information away for later. “Nice to meet you, Jack. I keep everyone updated on what’s what around here. You need to know something? I’m your guy.”

    At first, Jack found Oscar’s enthusiasm kind of amusing. The guy was clearly harmless, maybe a little odd, but nothing Jack couldn’t handle.

    It wasn’t until later that he realized what he had gotten himself into.

    Oscar was everywhere.

    No matter where Jack went—the dining hall, the lounge, even just rolling down the hallway—Oscar always managed to find him, eager to unload the latest round of facility gossip.

    “Gus says the night nurse fell asleep on duty again.”

    “They say we might get a new menu next week. Hope it’s not a lie like last time.”

    “I heard Maude yelled at a maintenance guy for leaving a smudge on the window.”

    Jack had barely been there a few days, and he already felt like he was being hunted. He’d turn a corner and—boom—Oscar was there, like some overeager news anchor with a personal mission to keep Jack informed on every single, issue.

    And the worst part? Oscar was oblivious to just how much he annoyed people.

    Jack tried everything—short responses, pretending to be busy, even flat-out ignoring him—but Oscar never took the hint. He’d just keep on talking, happy to have an audience, whether Jack liked it or not.

    At one point, Jack found himself sitting alone in the common area, enjoying a coffee.

    You hear about Virginia? She’s been giving the new physical therapist a hard time. Says she doesn’t need help, but she fell last week, so—”

    Jack sighed and rubbed his temples. This was his life now.

    His new friend was a nuisance.

    Trying to shift the conversation away from endless gossip, Jack decided to ask, “So, Oscar, why are you here? You can’t be much older than me—maybe 55 or60 maybe? Oscar’s expression changed slightly, as if he wasn’t used to being asked about himself. “I’m 55. I’ve got scoliosis. Had it all my life.”

    Jack thought for a moment, searching for something positive to say. “Well, you’re doing well, considering.”

    A proud grin spread across Oscar’s face as he accepted the compliment. “Yeah, I get by.”

    After a brief pause, Oscar glanced at his watch. “Well, I gotta go. I expect my family to visit today.”

    Jack watched as Oscar shuffled away, a little more aware of the weight the man carried. Annoying as he was, there was something about him Jack couldn’t quite shake. Maybe, just maybe, Oscar wasn’t just a nuisance.

    Maybe he was lonely, too.

    Oscar shares his table with Jack